Thursday, January 03, 2008

Believe it or not: Things I can do while nursing, and never flash a boob

-- cook dinner
-- sign permission slips, behavior charts, high school schedules and college applications
-- brush my teeth (and other people's)
-- go to the bathroom (not my favorite)
-- blog
-- referee squabbles and all-out wars
-- fix children's hair
-- drive (it was a loooong time ago and on back country roads)
-- teach classes full of 15, 16, and 17 years olds (who never knew what I was doing)
-- eat
-- walk through museums, aquariums, and amusement parks
-- dress toddlers...wiggly, moving toddlers
-- tie shoes, bows, and sashes (this is tricky)
-- sleep
-- attend and cheer for volleyball, basketball, football, and soccer games
-- clean house
-- take graduate school classes and exams
-- talk on the phone
-- shop
-- help vomiting child (quite unpleasant)
-- dine with friends
-- attend all school functions and meetings
-- enjoy piano, voice, and dance recitals, as well as band concerts
-- get a haircut (okay, and color)
-- wipe dirty I-can't-do-it-by-myself toddler bottoms (really yucky)
-- talk with a pediatrician, doctor, or dentist during an appointment
-- lecture fervently any child needing it
-- and smile for my six-year old who insisted on taking a picture as soon as baby sister latched on.






(Thankfully there is no boob showing, but look at those chins...ugh.)





Edited to add...Now that I reread this post, it seems more suitable as an entry to David Letterman's "Stupid Pet Tricks," right next to the dog that could open the fridge and grab a beer, and a cat that can meow the National Anthem. You know, those of us with true talent.

12 comments:

Annikke said...

I knew you were amazing, but some these really take the cake! Wow! I am impressed. I was able to multi-task, but never like you!

Kyra said...

WOW! You can do more while nursing than I can do all day! Thanks for visiting my blog! :)

Camille said...

This is one of the funniest posts I've ever read! Hilarious! and well done you!

(I was cruising, and found your blog. LOVE IT!)

Abbie said...

HOW oh how did you manage to nurse while teaching your class?? WOW!

Unknown said...

How do you do it without flashing a boob is my question! I've gotten pretty good about nursing anywhere, but I still occasionally flash because my child is a curious one...

Miranda said...

First, I can attest to the nursing while teaching; I witnessed it first hand, as a colleague. Well, I presume that's what was going on under the baby blanket. Outwardly, there was no indication.

Secondly, it's a good thing you can multi-task. In a previous post, how many years did you say you'd been nursing?

Thirdly, thanks for a chuckle!

LindaJean said...

Wowie! You are THEE MOM!

Heather said...

You must be double-jointed. Or a gymnast.

Anonymous said...

wow! I can barely nurse when I am nursing!!

Steph said...

Wow, you can do more while you're nursing than I can while bottle feeding. I am impressed! Guess multi-tasking is a do or die trait when raising six kids!!! :)

Melanie said...

You have quite a talent!! lol

MKHKKH said...

This is why God gave this job to us. Can imagine a man attempting to multitask like that! LOL.